Wednesday, December 30, 2009
What is it that turns nice people into wannabe rockstars who trash hotel rooms? Instead of appreciating that someone else is making your bed, you use towels once, leave trash scattered, and damn you, you earth hating bastards who everyday open up and waste a brand new bar of soap. Luckily someone came up with a solution to the never used middle of hotel soap. It can even be made into a bling ring that would make Run DMC proud or you could stick your prick in it and dickcheese be gone by the time the first groupie arrives. How rockstar is that?
Please excuse my use of the word dickcheese.
Monday, December 28, 2009
"Keep Calm....Carry On" was a motivational poster created by the British governement during WWII and never used. It's a good mantra for everday chaos and is best said using a Madonna-esque faux british accent. My friend Drew Elliot is starting an anti revolutionary revolution of these beautiful screen prints by giving them to loved ones (thankfully he loves me and I got a red one!) for x-mas and spreading the word. Comes in lots of colours from an amazing UK website called Keep Calm Gallery that has a great selection of screened prints. Thanks Drewpsie....now carry on!
Lady.... Macky.... and some good flatware...
It's Ramen Monday AKA Ramen-day's where every week me and Mack Dugan try a new ramen noodle joint in NY. Tonight we tried Ramen Setagaya on 1st Ave. which is a mini-chain in Tokyo. They had tasty vegetable gyoza's but the noodles were a little ho-hum. The highlight this week came courtesy of MOMA design store. For X-mas I bought both me and Macky a ramen SPORK designed by Masami Takahashi and they work brilliantly. Now I got to get to Asia for bespoke cases out of stingray.... Cutlery Cuntasia.
Sunday, December 27, 2009
Friday, December 25, 2009
Thursday, December 24, 2009
I was born and raised in Toronto and upon visiting family friends in NYC when quite young, I remember their kids asking me what it was like to live in an igloo. Slightly appalled by their ignorance and a smart ass since birth, I told them that while we personally don't live in them we do walk in snow shoes and are friends with alot of Eskimo's. Much like Lesbians the Inuit do not like being called fish eaters, but Inuit just sounds so didactic while Eskimo conjures up sweet images of cute parka clad smooches. I don't feel so bad after discovering the much more politically incorrectly named "Slanties" a brand of sunglasses geared towards hipsters but based on ancient Inuit goggles that helped prevent snow blindness. Available on their website for $75 with choice of 3 sizes, strap and wood type. Finally you get to see see through Sarah Palin's eyes. Alaska...isn't that where people live in igloos?
Vogue is a magazine. Voguing, is what kids on the Christopher St. Piers do while turning "walking the runway" into something that Vogue could never capture. Paris Is Burning is the famous documentary capturing the voguing balls of Harlem way before Madonna made it popular and when Vogue Evolution was still in diapers. This past weekend I volunteered at The Harvey Milk School for GLBTQ youth most of whom have transferred due to harrasment or violence at their schools or homes. They have voguing competitions in their cafeteria and once a year they hold a big ball to which I was asked to be one of the judges. These kids threw down literally! Taking their fashionable cues from the Paris houses they named themselves after, the Houses of McQueen ,Gaultier and Pucci turned it out. I couldn't take photos since many of these kids are not publicly out yet but let's just say Madonna ain't got nothing on these young Queens!
Videos of suicide dips and battles are usually the ones to watch but I've always gagged on Javier Ninja's New Way Voguing Hands Performance....Cuntasia!
If you don't know the difference between kiki and kai kai maybe this vintage LALA will help or maybe it will just have you scratching your mussy in confusion, werk!
Ladyfag's Little LALALA'S #33
For someone who prides herself on being able to talk to anyone she's having an awful hard time communicating up here in Canada...Apparently my use of the word CUNT is causing all sorts of confusion up North. I guess I didn't realize how fluent my QUEEN'S ENGLISH had become....Now I may know the difference between CUNT and CUNTY but my bafflement lies more in the term GIVING CUNT. For example you walk into a club and see a girl FULLY PRESSED,PUMPING A LOOK, and just general REALNESS while perching on the bar, head held high, completely UNBOTHERED and GIVING FACE....you know most of the boys will be walking by her wagging their faggot finger and exclaiming WERK BITCH!!!...why?....cause she is GIVING YOU CUNT!!! Now examples aside, clearly CUNT is the ultimate in FIERCENESS and you SERVE IT like it's gods given gift...Strangely enough whenever I undress and show my gods given gift of cunt to any faggot they run like it ain't a gift at all....TRUST! Not everyone always agrees on meanings, but I think it's generally agreed that MOPPING is stealing. I however beg to differ.... Madonna expropriating VOGUING and making it a video.... now that's MOPPING...all the money she made off it while the kids who really TURN IT make none off it...now that's stealing!....Which brings me to THROWING SHADE....Now you don't have to know the difference between TANJEE and BANJEE to know that they're both SHADY....but only one will CUT YOUR FACE...and neither will BEAT YOUR FACE, since that has nothing to do with Ike and Tina but more to do with you and Estee Lauder. Just be careful if anyone's COMING FOR YOU cause they ain't there to pick you up, they're their to READ you, and you can best be sure that it ain't on any bestseller's list. Now don't be asking me to SPILL THE T, even though we all know I know where the PNP is,but I am busy GIVING SHOWS....and anyways....this CATEGORY IS CLOSED!
Besos Y Brujas,
Wednesday, December 23, 2009
Tuesday, December 22, 2009
Nancy Cunard by Man Ray.
My bangle collection!
I went to Harlem with my friend Cator Sparks looking for one of my inspirations and obsessions Nancy Cunard who lived there briefly in the 1930's. I reported the whole journey back to Paper Magazine READ IT HERE!
Sunday, December 20, 2009
You know when you're young and your parents just always say something like it's fact and so thus it's instilled in you as such and then one day you realize that the whole world doesn't think so? My dad has always said that "Sophia Loren is the most beautiful woman in the world" and my whole life I have repeated it verbatim. The BBC however is reporting on a University of Toronto study that would make Shania Twain the ideal beauty....someone please gag me with a knife. Angelina Jolie didn't quite make the cut either since according to them beauty is based on numbers and the ideal measurements between the eyes, mouth and ears. Researchers who probably sit around in boring white lab coats and think DSquared2 is a formula, have now become beauty experts and are dolling out farcical fashion advice to women. They basically say if you are not the perfect measurements there's no need to have plastic surgery but to just use different hairstyles for optical illusion....Are you fuckin kidding?
Oh and get into Sophia's little tuft of armpit hair....gorgina!
Tonight we had our first snowfall and like most things NY we decided to go big! Not satisfied with a little flurry we had a full beautiful blizzard. I felt like I was walking in a snowglobe, with snowflakes blowing everywhere and the whole city covered in a blanket of white magic. It was like the storybook snow that fell all over the runway for John Galliano's winter 2009 show. It's one of my favourite shows, so inspired by tonight I just rewatched it on youtube and sighed throughout. If only tomorrow I'd wake up and Russian gypsy snow queens had taken over NY, instead tomorrow it'll probably all have turned to brown slush and NY will have been taken over yet again with girls in their gross Uggboots. So much for fairytale endings...
Saturday, December 19, 2009
Friday, December 18, 2009
Ladyfag, Cator Sparks, Daphne Guinness
Luckily Daphne Guinness did not wear her Mcqueen Armadillo shoes last night. I'd hate to have to roll a bitch so close to Christmas and in front of Santa. (Just being cheeky, she's very sweet and looked beautiful in her floor length kimono and anyways her feet are to small for me to mop em!!) Last night's Chandelier Creative's X-mas party was good festive fun. In between the full live gospel choir, my handsome Frenchie friend Alex Malgouyers provided the beats and the buff near naked bartenders provided the butts. I asked Santa if I could have the horse lamp in the front room....I mean you gotta feed the horse... ;) Santa knew right then I was too naughty all year to deserve a $6500 lamp (Designed by Front for Mooi) I would've posted more pics but let's just say the eggnog was spiked and by the end of the night none of us could even look Santa in the eye.
I'm a magazine junkie. Sadly it's getting harder to get my fix. Print magazines are slowly becoming a rare breed. At 55 years old I.D. magazine the oldest design mag in the biz is flipping its last page next month. Their annual design review which is the biggest and longest running design contest in the U.S. will be kept going on line. I enjoy reading blogs and online magazines, I might have a whole world of information at the tip of my manicured fingertips...but it does not come close to replacing real print. Blow up dolls will never replace real lovers and my computer will stay at my desk. When I go to bed I love to flip through pages over and over again ripping out my favourite pics, I have boxes of clippings and years worth of my cherished issues. While I admit at times I'm guilty of free flipping at the book store nothing beats the mornings they come delivered to my doorstep (except for Nylon magazine, why didn't anyone tell me it's for teenagers from L.A before I subscribed?!) . So this X-mas turn your friend's into junkies too. Cheaper than crack, magazine subscriptions are an addictive gift that keep on giving.
Thursday, December 17, 2009
Casey Spooner, Jerome Puch, Ladyfag
Ladyfag and Alex Malgouyers
Look at my face, it looks like I'm gonna poop my pants I want it so bad. Those earrings were so major, They actually had to be put on with a ribbon across the head and perched they were so heavy. Gorgina!
Just like the pouf he made famous...pouf he's gone. Recently Christian Lacroix an icon of Paris couture filed for bankruptcy and while I had my fingers crossed throughout, he failed to find a backer and it brings a tear to my eye to say it but he is now rendered a licensed name for perfumes and accessories. One of the few staunch uncompromising believers in the true art of couture is no longer. I was lucky enough to attend his last spring couture show in Paris, invited by my dear friend Jerome Puch who was head of communications at Lacroix. When I told him I was going to wear this chic outfit that happened to not include pants. He looked at me and sighed and said Lady I'm sure it's chic conasse but this is not ready to wear.... this is COUTURE.... He said it with a quiet passionate plea as though the very word couture itself was sacred. I can practically here Eddie chiming in "It's Lacroix darling....LACROIX!" For once even abfab can't make me laugh.
Ladyfag is wearing custom piece: Jose Duran,
skirt: Herve Leger, shoes: Burberry